Yaptus' Debris

Hi exteen it's me again after some months :) there's been many things happening. Everyone's getting ready fo school and all but me,im all calmed down, i dont know if i can enroll myself this sem cuz im financially short and my college wont accept promissory notes. Well anyway i dont wanna talk about that anymore :3 i've been really busy doing simple doodles, i feel productive when i do that's why i just keep on doodling and impressing my followers on tumblr (im not sure if they're impressed though,lol) and so then,im thinking to pursue my tshirt designs it'll be called Disturbingly Cute. i hope my bf's okay with that cuz i only have him,no one's be helping me out except for him.

my first time shopping at etude:

then they opened up a store near my place:

i hauled at Nail polishes most ^___^

this picture never gets old, i miss times like this, he always gets me chocolates every now and then >.< 

lol i was bored,okay?! 

me,before my haurcut a month ago :) 

i dont have my own room in this house so i was glad when i found this spot, unfortunately, i cant always be seen there :)  

Me and my friends are suppose to meet up a while ago this afternoon,unfortunately,it didnt work, so i ended up alone roaming around the mall. too desperate to kill time, i watched a movie, The Book Of Eli,i thought it was boring so i ordered up regular cornachos and bigtime ice tea so i wont get sleepy. But i was wrong the movie was very interesting that it touched my soul. google the movie and see for yourself.Later after the movie i went to the book store and guess what i bought?   

 yep, a Bible, no i mean, The Holy Bible, and yes this was a movie influence,so even if i only got a thousand bucks to spend for my entire week, i bought The Bible, I was so inspired i said God will get me through. And I was like,how stupid I am not having the best book in the universe, what air am i smoking in this world that i forgot the sole important thing, the word of God? and yeah, we all fight a terrible battle in our lives, and having someone to turn to is very relieving. Everybody can leave me. you. And at some point of our life we are fucked up and messed up, and its seems we cant do anything to make it better,you just cry and curse no one to blame but yourself. well at least,that's just me talking.ok here's the thing, I lost my dad at a very early age..my mom's nowhere(not really she's in Europe doing her job to keep me and my sister alive.).we were left here with my Aunt and her family,we really feel outcast,we knew we do not belong, and all this years,i still feel the same, yes they took care of me,yes they feed me and remind me not to get sick and go home early after school, but you know, they're like this family that's just too formal to show affection to us and my uncle who doesnt really care, all he care about is money and debt, i cant blame this family,they took us in. me and my sister have nobody but them,  but i dont want to stay here forever.i feel really sick right now. oh wait have i mentioned that im a 3rd year multimedia artist but i flunked many of my subject,like its gonna delay me for another 2 years in college? no? not yet? well there you go. Aint my life so fucked up, but hey it's all my fucking fault. and sometimes,nights like this,i cant sleep at all, thinking, thinking real hard how to handle my situation,and oh how can i forget that i still have this issue at school,the accounting office,they are demanding that i havent paid my tuition fee  last school year,just because they knew i lost my receipt and there'll be no evidence that i already paid?that's like 30 grand,man. then there's this guy last weekend who tricked me, and i lost my 10grand worth of savings. yeah,life's a grand aint it? ahaha.it really is tough when you're at it alone.this is just the beginning.and maybe,really maybe, that's the reason why i bought the Holy Bible,to find strength,i mean,im not totally fucked up like those poor families who lost their everything at disasters, but, another day without it,the Bible, you're gonna find me at the mental hospital.word. and now as i read it verse by verse, i remember how my childhood life sweet is.i remember my mom's Bible stories before we go to bed and my dad spanking me for being very hardheaded girl..i suddenly feel not so alone,i feel lighter,free,unbound and unshaken. i feel secure,safe,i feel like a kid again,never having problems with anything anyone, ill get by,i've always get by,with Him,im in his arms,He has plans for me,and im not scared.thats Amen. Life is beautiful,isnt it.? im happy to live.

edit @ 23 Mar 2010 02:38:11 by Yapo Nightroad